


In which Vanamonde suffers more than the ordinary amount

by Overlord_Bethany



Series: Clank and Dagger [4]
Category: Girl Genius (Webcomic)
Genre: Post-Canon, god help me I could tell you approximately what the headache cure tastes like, in-jokes continue apace, product of actual migraines
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-04
Updated: 2018-06-04
Packaged: 2019-05-18 00:37:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14842236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Overlord_Bethany/pseuds/Overlord_Bethany
Summary: Hadrian picked the wrong day for this nonsense.





	In which Vanamonde suffers more than the ordinary amount

Vanamonde hunched over his coffee, his shoulders up at the level of his ears, his brow furrowed. He imagined he looked like a duck hoarding carrion, but he lacked the strength to care. His head felt as though a thousand Jägers had used it for dancing practice, his spine ached, his hands trembled, and the biggest pain of all sat directly across from him.

“Hadrian,” he sighed, “that is not an actual problem.”

Hadrian Greenclaw bristled. “Of course it’s a problem! Do you know how much I’ve spent on hats just this month?”

“I am not going to tell the Jägers to stop challenging you for your hat.” Van accepted a stack of papers without looking at the person handing them over. “What makes you think they’d even listen to me?”

“Can’t you tell the Castle to launch them out of windows or something?”

Van flicked through the papers. “You and I both know all of the participants would find such an activity the greatest sport ever. You’d have Jägers lining up to get launched across the rooftops.” He had a vague memory of his grandfather describing similar hijinks long, long ago. “Is that really what you want?”

Hadrian slammed his fists on the table. “If it keeps them away from my hats, yes!”

The dishes on the table jumped. Vanamonde rescued his coffee and took a long, pensive sip. “You could just stop wearing hats.”

“In this town?” Hadrian gasped. He saw Van’s little smile, and his jaw clenched. 

At least they were both suffering. 

“What about the other thing?” Hadrian persisted, and Van made a vague shushing motion. 

“Not now, Hadrian. I haven’t looked over the forms.” A fresh stab of pain radiated from the back of his head, throbbing along his jaw, up to his eyebrows, and down his spine. Van wanted to bury his face in his hands and close his eyes, but that would only make the room tilt like a ship in a storm. 

“You?” Hadrian the Pest gasped, gaping at him. “You’ve had paperwork in your possession for twenty-four hours and you  _haven’t looked at it?_  Not even a little?”

“Hadrian, please—”

“Is it a national holiday or a natural disaster? I need to know which suit to wear.”

Vanamonde ground his teeth together, which only caused a fresh wave of pain. “I swear I will sell you for spare parts.”

Hadrian opened his mouth to object, but a nudge to his shoulder distracted him. He looked up at Tarvek Sturmvoraus, and he bristled a bit. Tarvek nudged him again. 

“Make room, Greenclaw.”

“Why doesn’t  _he_  have to move over?” Hadrian gestured at Van, who stared with some curiosity at the brown glass vial Tarvek had just deposited beside his coffee. 

“Sorry I’m late. Drink that.”

With less deliberation than was prudent around Sparks of any sort, Vanamonde swallowed the contents of the vial, which, it turned out, tasted of pickles and suffering. “Hexagonal Heterodyne’s horrible haircut!” he gasped, trying to blink the tears from his eyes. “ _What_ was that?”

Having won his seat from Hadrian, Tarvek had grace enough to look apologetic. “Gil’s headache cure. I know. It’s awful.” He produced a second vial, which Vanamonde regarded with suspicion. “This is just a decoction of spearmint and lavender. To stop the taste.” 

Van accepted the second vial. At this point, what did he have to lose?

**Author's Note:**

> In other news, I've begun writing side stories to my novel (which I am currently editing). If you're interested, one about young Uther can be found [right here](https://overlord-off-record.tumblr.com/post/174504211239/ive-begun-writing-side-stories-to-that-book-of).


End file.
